- You base your decision to purchase a new car on whether or not the back seat folds completely flat.
- The amount of dog fur in your lint trap has resulted in a fine from the fire department.
- You carpet over your carpet with linoleum.
- You can tell your dogs apart simply by listening to them drink.
- You’re complimented on your fabulous Angora sweater while wearing a sweatshirt.
- You’ve ever substituted dog biscuit crumbs for bread crumbs.
- You’ve used the excuse “My dog ate my homework” and it’s actually true.
- Half the cabinet space in your kitchen is devoted to dog treats.
- You have a separate washer and dryer for dog towels.
- You know that a Thundershirt isn’t a souvenir from an AC/DC concert.
- Your spouse prefers the dog house because there is more room and less cover stealing.
- Your jacket pockets smell like hot dog.
- You color coordinate your wardrobe to match your dog.
- You can’t remember the name of your own doctor but have your vet on speed dial.
- You’ve argued with a hotel over how much your dog weighs.
- You spell verbs rather than saying them out loud.
- You’ve been in a fist fight over what type of dog leash to use.
- You know that counter conditioning has nothing to do with woodwork.
- You define BSL as bullshit legislation.
- The only cookie cutters in your house are shaped like dog biscuits.
- You definition of DAP has nothing to do with respect.
- When you think of Kong you don’t picture a gorilla.
- You have red stars on your calendar to mark the days your local store gets their shipment of lint rollers.
- You consider slobber a high compliment.
- The phrase most often muttered in your sleep is “What have you got in your mouth?”
- You know more about vacuum cleaners and carpet cleaning products than Consumer Reports
Of course we know you have more and we’d love for you to share them here.
Dog Lover’s Digest