Being a dog lover is a lot like being a standup comedian. Recounting the adventures of you and your dogs can sound like the dog owners equivalent of “You Might Be a Redneck.” Additionally, more than one dog-less person has posed questions to me that seem to beg for a sign. So, in the spirit of Jeff and Bill’s observational skills, I’d like to offer a few from the dog lovers point of view.
You might be a dog lover if…
- Out of 20 coupons printed on your grocery receipt, 19 are for dog treats
- You have a couch in your house that humans are not allowed to sit on
- You wear nothing but earth tones
- There are at least three lint rollers in every room
- You have a washing machine dedicated to dog towels
- You refer to the closet of stuffed toys you got on clearance as “Death Row”
- The local animal shelters have you on speed dial
- Your veterinarian personally thanks you for sending her kids to college
- You have panic attacks because you can’t breathe only to discover it’s a hairball
- You have to be physically restrained when the topic of flexi leashes comes up
Here are a couple of photos of things in my house that have recently prompted someone to ask me if I had a dog.
If you have any stories of non dog people asking questions without the aid of available data, please share them with us.