Here’s Your Sign

Being a dog lover is a lot like being a standup comedian. Recounting the adventures of you and your dogs can sound like the dog owners equivalent of “You Might Be a Redneck.” Additionally, more than one dog-less person has posed questions to me that seem to beg for a sign. So, in the spirit of Jeff and Bill’s observational skills, I’d like to offer a few from the dog lovers point of view.

You might be a dog lover if…

  • Out of 20 coupons printed on your grocery receipt, 19 are for dog treats
  • You have a couch in your house that humans are not allowed to sit on
  • You wear nothing but earth tones
  • There are at least three lint rollers in every room
  • You have a washing machine dedicated to dog towels
  • You refer to the closet of stuffed toys you got on clearance as “Death Row”
  • The local animal shelters have you on speed dial
  • Your veterinarian personally thanks you for sending her kids to college
  • You have panic attacks because you can’t breathe only to discover it’s a hairball
  • You have to be physically restrained when the topic of flexi leashes comes up

Here are a couple of photos of things in my house that have recently prompted someone to ask me if I had a dog.

Why yes, we have dogs. Why do you ask?

I wasn't feeling well!

If you have any stories of non dog people asking questions without the aid of available data, please share them with us.

Cheers,

Kevin

9 thoughts on “Here’s Your Sign

  1. Very funny! I can so relate to this. Love my Zoe and do most things just to keep her happy.

    We once had a dinner guest that complained about the dog in the kitchen while we cooked. He wasn’t asked back so as not to offend the dog. 🙂

  2. I have 4 dogs and I am on an online dating site. I have a pic of the pack posted and I get “are those all your dogs?” when I wrote in my profile I have 4 big dogs. why yes they are my dogs. here’s your sign

  3. I was suprised to see the one about the flexi lead!! I am a dog trainer and I HATE those things! They are an accident (or 2 or 3!) waiting to happen. I once saw a guy walking his dog down the sidewalk of a busy street, his dog spooked from from a sewer grate on the sidewalk and because the leash wasn’t ‘locked’ his dog bolted into traffic. Luckily he wasnt hit!

    • I am kind of ambivalent about the flexi-leads. I do use them myself but I know how and where to use them and I can pretty much predict how my dogs will react to certain situations. But for those that aren’t aware of the shortcomings of these leashes, they can be very hazardous indeed.

  4. Loved the list and hope you don’t mind a few of my own.

    – Living in New England I find the dog has more sweaters/coats then I do.
    – My Christmas cards have been the dog with Santa or some other photo
    of the dog.
    – My mother refers to the dog as her favorite grandchild.
    – The dog exchanges various holiday gifts (such as Christmas, birhday,
    adoption anniversary, and anything else worth celebrating) with other
    dog friends.
    – If when walking the dog doesn’t trust you, then either do I!
    – Get together with friends are also dog playdates.
    – The backseat of the SUV is for dogs only and when someone does need
    to sit in the back, the seat covers need to be changed.
    – When out trying to decide what to get for dinner we have actually
    considered what the dog would like.
    – And I knew I was a a dog person when shopping at the grocery store I
    have had people comment that they did not recognize me at first without
    my dog.

    Thanks as I recently discoved your blog and I enjoy it.

  5. You know you’re a dog lover when: –
    you give people a strange look when they ask you – with great concern in their voice – why you have a bruised nose, split lip, or some other mark on your face or stomach.

    Then you remember you have a Huntaway and he gave you them when you were playing 😀

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