It’s not the most productive of habits, but I often listen to music as I write. Sometimes I tend to be too much inside my own head and the music keeps me from being too self indulgent.
As I was writing today, Paul Simon’s “Still Crazy After All These Years” came on; as if on cue, my fearful girl, Annie, walked in for some attention. A puzzled look came over her face as I laughed and serenaded her with my best Paul Simon. If only I’d had the chicken suit!
Sitting there, singing to her, the lyrics painted a melancholy picture of my little girl:
“I’m not the kind of man who tends to socialize. I seem to lean on old familiar ways. And I ain’t no fool for love songs that whisper in my ears. Still crazy after all these years.”
I’d like to tell you that this was a song about Annie’s past, but I’d be lying. Annie is better than she was when we brought her home from the shelter all those years ago, and she is much the same. Storms still bother her and she will always need reassurance when I drop f-bombs at the TV. Her face will always register the phrase, “waiting for the other shoe to drop.” She will always be the last one to finish her dinner scanning the area around her with each bite, and she will always want her soccer ball with her when she goes outside.
Even though she is not the dog I envisioned, she is the dog (one of them) I have. She forgets herself sometimes and opens up to the possibility of being carefree; alone, worth the price of admission for me.
So I guess the video above is for us both. Call us crazy if you want, but remember that we can be happy too.